Last Moments with Dad and a Week of Family
Friday, November 18th
A tender last ‘I love you’ from Dad
Friday morning I was already rushing around getting everything packed for our Thanksgiving week at the Lodge. The kids were in school until 12:30 and then we’d leave by 1:00 so that we would have enough time to stop in and see my parents before continuing to Midway. At 10:00am my mom sent a text that said Dad had taken a turn for the worse. The nurse was there with her and they could see sudden signs of decline. He was having trouble taking food or swallowing, sweating a lot and slow to respond. I quickly finished everything and we made our way to Provo.
Megan, Luke, Matt and I arrived at about 5:00pm and I immediately went in to see him. He was in the hospital bed lying perpendicular to my mom’s bed. I climbed on the foot of mom’s bed and sat beside him. In just a few weeks he looked a lot worse. His face was sunken and pale and he had lost a lot of weight. Mom came in and carefully rubbed his shoulder and whispered that Lisa and the kids were here and his eyes opened and he tried to connect. Luke and Matt had stopped just outside his bedroom door. I think the change in his physical appearance was just a bit shocking. Grandpa saw them in the hall and his eyes widened and eyebrows shot up. He carefully moved his fingers to point at them and we all knew his gestures meant ‘I know you rascals’. The boys walked in and Megan followed. I told Dad that Luke was just about to get his drivers license. Dad’s always interested in that kind of thing — and would be especially interested with Luke since he has taken him on secret practice driving sessions a couple of times in Colorado when he was 14. Matt remembered that we had wanted to have Dad listen to an old song that he was just introduced to. Matt found ‘50 Ways to Leave your Lover’ by Paul Simon and pushed play. Of course Dad recognized it immediately. Moving his arms caused him a lot of pain, but he stuck up his two pointer fingers and moved them back and forth to the beat like he was dancing. We all laughed. We asked him how he was feeling and he was able to quietly answer a few questions. He hadn’t been awake to hardly eat anything that day and so mom helped him with a few bites of pudding - which would actually be the last thing he ate. Then she gathered the kids off to the kitchen to eat some soup. I went to follow them but when I reached the door of his room, he quietly called out, Lisa. I barely heard him. I turned and headed back to the bed. Slowly and with effort he said, ‘Lisa, I’m really glad to see you again. I love you.’ I was filled with love and gratitude and emotion. I love you too Dad. How grateful I was to have had this one-on-one time with him before he passed. Dad didn’t stay alert for long. He drifted back to sleep and after watching him for a minute I headed into the kitchen. Mom hadn’t been able to wake him for most of the day, so it was a tender mercy that he was able to be alert enough for the kids and I to talk to him for just a few minutes. After his passing, I shared this tender experience with family and friends and cried every time.
Saturday, November 19th
Gathered as a family around Dad’s Bed
It was 10:20am and I was picking up cinnamon rolls from the Midway Bakery with Mindy and Megan Jackson when my mom texted…. ‘Dad is unresponsive to me. I can’t get him to open his eyes even a little. He’s labored in his breathing. Feels like sacred time.’ Back at the lodge, Chris read it and immediately called. ‘I think you need to go down.’ Mindy and Megan gave me a hug and offered to help with anything I needed. I got ready and Chris and I headed down pretty quick.
Chris and I and the kids were the first to arrive. We again took our place beside him in his room and watched as he struggled for breath. It was definitely different from even yesterday. Labored breathing. It felt painful to watch, always on edge, waiting to see if another breath would come. A hospice nurse had come out and checked on him as we arrived and said, ‘It’s time. He won’t last long. Within the next three days’, he guessed. He left and we stood around him and let that news sink in. We were at the end.
Mike, Carly and their girls and Scott and his boys got their pretty soon after we did. Obviously it’s BYU game day so my family and Scotts were all decked out in BYU blue. We wear BYU a lot anyway, but that day it was to head to the football game that afternoon. Even my mom is in her BYU shirt.
Dad seemed to do better when the top of his hospital bed was tilted up slightly, but his body was slipping down and his neck was folded which made it seem like it was contributing to his rough breathing. In an effort to try to make him more comfortable Scott, Mike and Chris decided to grab under his arms and lift him up. He had recently had considerable pain in his arms and so the movement jolted him awake and he cried out in anguish. He continued to whimper as we tried to get him settled but his eyes opened for the first time since the night before when I had been with him.
He couldn’t really move his head or his arms but he was aware of us surrounding him. We could sense his desire to communicate with us and we longed to express our feelings to him — realizing that this was our last chance. The room was filled with love, emotion and purpose that is really hard to describe.
Brian was the first to realize that the rest of the family needed to be here for this. He pulled out his phone and video called Amy. I remember that she answered the call with a ‘Hi’. Brian silently and immediately gave her a quick glance around the room to show us gathered around him. She quickly got emotional, gathered her family near her and joined in the watching and crying. We must have explained what was going on and been emotional as we did it. At one point Brian held the phone up to Dad so they could see each other and Amy was able to tell him she loved him. I think Mike video called Dan and he and Sarah shared their love as well. We even got the phones close together so Amy could say hi to Dan. For a moment we were all there together.
This was the first time any of us had seen baby Melanie. She was born a week or two earlier, but because of a bad RSV season, they had been extra careful and she hadn’t been around anyone. Today was the first and only time Melanie and Grandpa met.
Chris and the kids each took a turn to tell David/Grandpa how much they loved him. Most of the time he had his breathing mask on which made it easier to get air, but every so often it looked like he was trying to say something so Chris would take it off to allow him to slowly and softly whisper ‘I love you guys’ or to Chris… ‘You have a good family.’ It was so emotional to watch.
Dad was probably alert for about 15 minutes before drifting back off into sleep and continued labored breathing. We stayed around his bed for a time. I think Megan caught the above picture with my phone and I’m not sure what we were smiling about but we kept going from tears to laughter and back to tears — which would be the pattern of the week.
After awhile Chris and the kids and Scott and his boys left for the BYU game. I decided to stay with Mom, Mike, Carly and Brian. We hung out both in Dad’s room and the family room by the kitchen and enjoyed being together, watching over Dad (and Mom) and letting everyone know what was going on on our family text thread.
The BYU group came back over after the game and we headed back up to the Lodge in the early evening.
Picture taken by Mike
Dan and Sarah drove into town arriving at 9:00pm. They were in Las Vegas at an Ortho conference and decided to rent a car and drive up. They were able to sit beside Dad for a little while and watch his labored breathing. They talked to him and shared their love again, but he didn’t respond in any way.
As I finally got in bed I texted my family… “Finally going to bed with tired eyes from many tears today. It was such a good day and I’m so happy to have spent some good time with Dad - and all of you - last night and today. At 7:00 I left Mom and Dad’s house to head back to the Lodge. We’re hosting three families here and they were wonderful to talk to tonight. These are the same families who helped me with Ryan’s reception here at the Lodge. Apparently they are the ones to help me through life’s big moments.’ I then asked for Mom to let us know immediately if he passed in the night.
“As we wait with those who are dying… we brush against the veil as good-byes and greetings are said almost within earshot of each other. ”
Sunday, November 20th
My Dad, David Kenneth Walton - Passed at 5:00am, November 20th, 2022
My mom remembers waking up at 3:00am and hearing my Dad’s uneven breathing. Then at 5:00 she suddenly woke up and laid there in the silence. She couldn’t hear him. She knew he was gone. She laid there peacefully for another few minutes before sitting up and moving to the end of her bed. He had passed. She couldn’t pinpoint the exact time he died but talking about it after we suggested that the sudden lack of shallow rhythmic breathing may have woken her. At 5:14am she texted us… ‘Dad has passed. Sometime between 3:00 and now. I will miss him so much.’
Sarah got the text minutes later and woke up Dan and then Brian and they went to her. At 5:21am, Amy texted, “I’m so glad you (three) are there. We are leaving as soon as we are packed. This will be a very special Thanksgiving for sure. Love you so much, Mom.”
I woke up suddenly. It was dark and I instinctively and anxiously reached for my phone. It was 5:50. I read the text that he had passed. I didn’t get emotional immediately. I felt calm and at peace and a desire to be at the house with my Mom. I woke up Chris and we quietly got ready and left the Lodge.
Dan texted that he and Sarah, Brian and Mom were sitting and talking. Mom had just called the Hospice and they were waiting to hear back from the nurse on what happens next. Dan added… ‘Mom is doing well right now. She feels an overall sense of peace’.
Carly added… ‘Love you so much Mary. I’m so happy David is not in pain anymore. Going to miss him so much though.’
Chris and I arrived by 6:30. Hugs for Mom and Dan and Sarah and Brian. Chris and I took a minute to go in and see my Dad. Everyone gave us a minute but then followed us in and we sat and stood around him. I don’t remember the first time I cried. It could have been in the van on the way down with Chris, or when I hugged my mom and siblings or when I saw him on the bed - not struggling for breath. I guess it was probably all of those times. One thing is certain - whenever we looked around the room and saw someone’s eyes filled with emotion, we joined in. That’s just how we work. When Scott and Elisha arrived an hour later we did the same thing. More hugs and tears. More standing around Dad. More looking around at each other and matching emotion.
We moved to the couches by the fireplace and started talking… Mom, Scott and Elisha, Dan and Sarah, Mike and Carly, Brian, Chris and I. Amy texted that they were on the road and I texted back that we were sitting together in the living room talking. ‘We take turns crying and laughing. The mortuary will be coming to pick up his body about 11:00.” Amy responded. ‘I want to cry and laugh! Can’t wait to get there.’ Soon we video called her in and she was part of our conversations. I wish I remember what we were laughing about. I’m sure we were reminiscing about funny Dad characteristics, planning out the week, talking about the funeral. expressing gratitude, and making jokes. Then one of Dad or Mom’s siblings would call after getting the news and Mom would get emotional and then we would too. Jim Walton was sobbing when he called early that morning and it was tender to hear him express his love.
Katie brought Emily, Megan, Luke and Matt to the house about 10:30. We had let them sleep but texted them to let them know that he had passed and to call when they woke up.
We texted Ryan and Cassie as well and Ryan responded with the most beautiful text…
Mom I’m so sorry for your loss. Cassie and I are going to miss him so so much! I’m glad we saw him last month for an early goodbye. (Ryan and Cassie had stopped in to spend some time with them on a quick weekend trip to see Cassie’s family. It was a Sunday morning and Ryan was able to bless and pass the Sacrament and watch Sacrament meeting on Zoom with them in the living room. My parents were so grateful to see them and spend some time.) I didn’t truly think I wouldn’t see him again, but he said such sweet things to us, that we are a great couple and repeatedly how much he loves us and that he is happy (and he told me not to get cancer) that I knew he was saying goodbye. He is such a good example! Such a fun and endlessly loving personality. I am so grateful that Cassie got to know him before he passed. He is such a light and warmth to everyone he knew. I hope that you and Grandma are doing alright. We are thinking of you and are so so glad you all got to spend so much time with him yesterday.
Family Prayer and Watching as they took his Body from the House
Black and white pictures from Mike
We decided to gather in my parents bedroom around my Dad for a family prayer before they took his body away. I think my mom asked Scott to say it. Towards the end of the prayer, the mortuary team arrived and I quietly opened the door and told them to wait for just a minute. When the prayer had ended, they very respectfully entered, greeted us and we led them to his body. We watched as they reverently covered him and then Chris, Scott, Mike and Dan helped move his body from the hospital bed to the gurney and then carefully down the stairs and then outside into the mortuary van.
We followed them to the front steps and expressed our gratitude and cried as they drove him away. Love this picture Brian took from the living room.
We stayed for most of the afternoon, talking and laughing and thinking through things. We greeted mom’s thoughtful friends and bishopric members who came with baskets of oranges and flowers and cards.
All day she received texts from friends sending their condolences as soon as they heard. Several times her first thought was that she needed to find Dad so she could read it to him, then a half second later she’d remember and get teary eyed. It was good to be together for all of it.
Chris and I and the kids headed back to the Lodge around 4:00. The Jacksons, Larsons and Theurers had a big taco dinner ready for us and as soon as I walked in wanted to give me a hug and hear about the day. Such good friends. I opened a few late birthday presents from Chris and the kids. An apple watch and cream band from Chris, a puzzle, a Lulu fanny pack, Yorks, a makeup brush and sugar scrub…. So nice.
I had a long conversation with Ryan and Cassie. Ryan got choked up talking about grandpa and how glad he was that Cassie was able to meet ad know him — and how good he was to her. We are now working on flights for them.
Dan and Sarah headed to the airport to catch a flight home. They were so grateful to be in Provo for exactly 24 hours and were grateful for how the timing worked for them. They would pack and get their kids and return on Wednesday. That night my mom spent some time responding to sweet messages and soaking in the bathtub. She told us she was feeling fine but exhausted. I think we all were.
Monday, November 21st
Meeting with the Mortuary
Chris and Amy had driven most of Sunday and arrived early on Monday. When I drove down from the Lodge, they had just arrived and it was so good to see them.
Mom had arranged for the representative of the Mortuary to come on Monday at 1:00 and I was anxious to be there. Scott, Brian, Amy, Mom and I gathered in the front room with him and it was such a good meeting and I was so happy to be a part of it. We were able to figure out everything we needed to do, arrange the funeral time and make a plan for the week. We also picked the floral spray that would go on top of the casket. Looking through the catalogue of roses and flower arrangements we discussed how none of these really seemed to fit Dad. We laughed that what Dad needed was an arrangement of moss and branches. The director turned to a page with beautiful greenery sprays and we immediately liked it. It felt just like walking through Watershed up near their house in Canada. We took some notes and made some plans for the week and then they left.
Mom, Amy and I looked through some boxes and files to find pictures and things for the display table and Brian started working on the program. Everything he does is brilliant so of course he was the man for the job.
Friends and neighbors continued coming to the door with flowers, baskets, food, cookies and more. We were in awe of how people reached out and vowed to be more thoughtful and compassionate.
Writing the Life Sketch
Later we sat down in the front living room to write Dad’s Life Sketch. I sat by Scott on the far side of the couch opposite the front door. He had his laptop on his lap and we pulled up Del’s Life Sketch to get an idea of where to start, which really helped. We had so much fun writing. We laughed and laughed thinking of things to add and how to say it. Now I can’t remember what was so funny but I just remember it was great being there with Mom, Scott, Amy, Mike, Brian, Chris, Katie and others. We enjoyed thinking through what to say about Dad’s childhood, mission, dating years, work and church service.
Life Sketch for David K. Walton
David Kenneth Walton, our loving husband, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, friend and the patriarch of our family returned home to our Heavenly Father on November 20, 2022 at the age of 73.
David was born on March 27, 1949 to Leslie Kenneth Walton and Naida Ruby Harding. He was the first of five children and was raised in Calgary Alberta, Canada. He had a happy childhood participating in choir and theatrical performances and riding his bike around Calgary, especially to the airport to watch the planes takeoff and land. His love of cars started early when the family purchased a second car, a beige and green Hilman Minx.
David served as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in the California North Mission. After returning, he completed his bachelor’s degree in Business-Finance from BYU. While at BYU David met the love of his life, Mary Polley, and impressed her with his gorgeous hair, charming smile and foreign accent. They were sealed for time and all eternity in the St. George Temple on August 9, 1973. David took his first job after college with Imperial Oil in Edmonton, Alberta. After Lisa and Scott were born, they moved to the Vancouver, British Columbia area where Dan, Amy, Mike and Brian joined the family. David was a dedicated father taking advantage of every opportunity to teach the gospel of Jesus Christ, the value of hard work and the importance of family. He also loved to have fun and instilled in each of his children a love of the outdoors and a sense of adventure. He spent the rest of his professional career working for Atkinson and Terry Insurance where he was a valued employee and beloved manager, known for his integrity, dedication and hard work. David was a true disciple of Jesus Christ and served faithfully in numerous church callings including Bishoprics and Stake Presidencies. He especially loved his time working with the youth, young single adults and serving in the Vancouver Temple. David loved cars, documentaries, riding motorcycles, spreadsheets and cherry pies. He closed many days watching the news with a bowl of popcorn and glass of grape juice. In 2018, David and Mary left their beloved home and friends in the Vancouver area and moved to Utah to be closer to their children and grandchildren.
David is survived by his wife of 49 years, Mary; children Lisa (Chris) Johnson, Scott (Elisha), Dan (Sarah), Amy (Chris) Silva, Mike (Carly) and Brian. He is also survived by 23 adoring grandchildren, 4 siblings, and many other family members and friends whom he loved.
Funeral services will be held Saturday, November 26, 11:00 am, at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints meeting house at 4200 North Foothill Drive, Provo, Utah. Viewing will immediately precede the memorial service from 9:30 to 10:30 am.
Tuesday, November 22nd
Thoughts and a Picture on Social Media
I finally posted a picture and thoughts on Instagram and Facebook today. I’ve been physically busy and emotional exhausted and just hadn’t sat down to pour out my heart into written word. What do I even say to sum up how I feel right now. I locked myself in my room at the Lodge and cried as I wrote…
It’s been a rough couple years for my dad since his prostate cancer came back and while we were devastated with the initial news, we have held on tight, gathered more and treasured every last minute we’ve been able to have with him. He passed away on Sunday and I’m so grateful I was able to have an unforgettable few moments with him alone on Friday where he expressed his love to me and then some sacred time on Saturday where we gathered around him as a family to hear his last words of love. Words can’t describe what an amazing Father he was and how much I will miss him but I am forever changed by his example and hope to continue his legacy of faith in our Savior, and the importance of family and creating fun and meaningful memories together. Every time we were together he hugged me and told me what a great job I was doing. His encouragement meant the world to me. I love you Dad. Until we meet again.
A few texts and comments from friends and family…
BYU Friend Adam: So sorry! So glad for the tender moments and the peace the gospel brings.
BYU Friend Marilee: Ohhhh! You guys!!! Sending so much love and prayers! We are saddened to hear of the loss of such an amazing man but what a gift he was and will always be to your sweet family and all who knew him! Thinking of you all at this time! Please keep us posted about the funeral plans.
Cassie’s mom, Tyna Bean: Aren’t we grateful for the knowledge we have of forever families and we can see them again someday?! Such a blessing! So glad you had some special time before the extended goodbye for mortality. I know he will always be closer than you know. He sure loves his family! Enjoy your family time this week
.Chris’ Aunt, Wendy: Lisa, I am so sorry for your loss. Hold on to all those precious memories.
Georgia friend Valeni: I know it is heartbreaking to lose our loved ones but how grateful we are for the Plan of Salvation.
Germany friend Brittany: Hugs. Let me know if there’s anything you need.
Germany friend Melissa: Fathers and Daughters, that’s a relationship like no other, and an ache like no other. Love you Lisa and I’m so sorry.
Chris’ mom, Shelley: He will always be watching over you!
Colorado friend, Mindy: (heart)
Cousin Elisa: Each post makes me cry again, my heart is hurting for each of you. He and your mom sure raised an amazing group of people. I’m so glad you guys were able to make time to be together during these last years, I know you will always cherish it. I look forward to celebrating his life this weekend with each of you.
Maryland friend Missy: Love you Lisa! Thoughts and prayers for your entire family.
Instagram friend, Jennifer: This brings me to tears! I have never met him but I have sensed his goodness and light as I have followed your blog over the years. And he has the cheeriest smile! I think your son Mathew looks so much like him. Hugs to you all at this tender time!
Chris’ Aunt, Eileen: Such a great dad. May your love and faith carry you through the days ahead.
Colorado friend Saralyn: Hugs and prayers to you and your family. The separation is hard. So glad you made more time and effort to enjoy every moment. So glad to hear you had sacred time together before he passed - such a miracle. Lots of Love to you.
Sister in law, Lindsey: Love you.
Canada friend Gina: Thinking of you and your family and sending love. Your dad had one of the best smiles around.
Georgia friend Cathy: I’m so sorry to hear this, Lisa. Losing a parent is earthsaking, even when our faith reassures us. Hugs to you and your family.
Sister in law, Elisha: Beautiful!!
Teacher friend, Lori: I am so sorry for your loss, Lisa.
Canada friend Jenae: Oh Lisa. I am so very sorry. I just loved your dad. He was always so sweet. Thinking of him and your family. Sending hugs.
Sister in law, Ashlyn: (heart)
Ricks friend, Hilary: Lisa, I’m so sorry. Losing a Dad is so hard and I could see you were extra close with yours. Praying for comfort and for you to be filled with happy memories.
Sister in law, Sarah: I cry again every time I read someone’s post : )
Canada friend, Jenn Merryman: Sending you and your family love. He was an amazing man and the best example.
Maryland friend, Mary Seaquist: Hugs and prayers to you and your family.
BYU Friend, Marilee: Love you and your family so much! Your dad was a pillar of strength and wisdom for all who knew him! He will be so missed!
Marilee’s mom, Janet M: Don and I were so sad to hear of your dad’s passing! Much love to you and your family!
Mom’s roommate, Rita Tanner: Beautiful tribute! So sorry for your loss. I was one of your mom’s college roommates and knew and loved your dad.
Dad’s co-worker, Bonnie Elliott: Lisa, what a beautiful tribute to your Dad. I feel blessed and honored to have known him. We shared many serious as well as funny conversations. He will be greatly missed by so many.
Cousin, Lanni: So sorry to hear of his passing. He really was an awesome example to us all. Always kind, loving and such an amazing father and husband. He truly loved his family. That was very evident. I will always remember his gentle demeanor, (which reminds me so much of Grandpa) and his love of music. So many fun memories of growing up listening to my uncles sing, such fun memoreis! sending love and prayers to you all, and grateful for the knowledge that we will see him again. Love you.
Colorado friend, Katie: So sorry to hear this. Prayers for your whole family.
Canada friend, Lynn Sloan: Lisa, your father was the most wonderful down to earth man. He was the perfect combination of fun and faith. We, too, learned from him and I loved serving along side him throughout the years. He taught me about absolute commitment and steadiness!! We love and miss him. Please know that our payers are with your family.
Dad’s Aunt, Bonnie Law: I lived in Calgary with his folks when he was a baby and have loved him over these MANY years. Love to Mary and all the family.
Colorado friend, Brenda: Oh Lisa, I am so sorry. Thinking of you and your family at this difficult time.
Ricks friend, Ardice: What a beautiful tribute to your father. Comfort to you and your family.
Dad’s cousin, Dee Henrie: Your Dad is an amazing man and I expect his influence and guidance will continue for a long time yet. He will be missed but not forgotten.
Abbey’s mom, Caroline: Thinking of you and your family!! Love you
Katie girl: (heart)
Annie Christofferson: (white hearts)
Dad’s cousin, Blain Lawlor: Great tribute. He is a cousin close to my age. So sorry he was called hom so soon.
Dad’s friend, Silvana De Feo: So sorry to hear this news Lisa. Your father was the first Canadian member of the church that my husband and I met when we first moved to Canad thirty years ago. he was also our bishop, a great example of faith and dedication. A great man! The world just lost a very special man! Hugs to all of you.
Colorado friend, Scott Richins: Wonderful tribute! We love you and pray for you and your family as you mourn this huge loss. Sending a big hug.
Dallie’s mom, Rachel Johsnon: Lisa, I am so sorry for your loss. He was such an amazing man, and has left an incredible legacy.
Maryland friend, Terri: What tender memories and what a great legacy!!! I’m so sorry for your loss!!! Love you friend
Canada friend, Lisa Watson-Vance: Thinking of you and your family Lisa.
Canada friend, Sarah Burnham: I have great memories of your dad. Going to the corn busts, playing badminton and game nights. I was very lucky to be a part of your family while I was growing up. Thinking of you and your family. So sorry for your loss my friend.
Christina (from my home ward): Your Dad was my Bishop through my teen years when my parents got divorced. He was also involved with ministering to me when I reactivated in my mid 20’s. I always appreciated his calm and loving demeanor. Words will never be found for how grateful I am to him. I hope you can find comfort in knowing how many people he loved and served. I always felt a little closer to heaven around him. He really was the real deal. He truly lived what he believed.
Colorado friend, Peggy K: Oh, Lisa! Your words about him are so sweet and sincere. What a wonderful relationship you had. I’m sure it’s still hard. I’ll be thinking of you.
Colorado friend, Linda Buchanan: My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this time. so grateful you were able to have those precious memories with him. May you be comforted at this time and feel Heavenly Father’s love.
Washington friend, Kathi Martin: I’m so sorry. Clearly your love for each other was strong and sure! Sending prayers for peace and comfort.
Canada friend, Sylvia Tremblay: So glad to have known him! He is the reason we came back to activity in the Church! He never gave up on us and we will forever be grateful!
Colorado friend, Tia Saxton: I’m so sorry Lisa. My heart hurts fo you. Losing a daddy has to be so hard. I’m glad you had some special moments with him and such a sweet relationship you can treasure. Love and hugs to all of you!
Colorado friend, Crystal Browning: I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like such an amazing man. Sending my love to you and your family.
Colorado friend, Tiffany Hale: Oh, Lisa, we are so sorry to hear this. What a great legacy he has left. So much love to you and your family.
Canada friend, Dawna H: Your Dad is one of the best men I have ever known! He has a way to put people at ease and was the best example of someone who was an intentional devoted follower of Jesus Christ. His love for his family was evident in all he did and he loved having fun and including others. He made a big impact in my life. My heart is sad for your family in his passing. I have fond memories of him as the MC at my wedding reception, teaching me to waterski, playing badminton and going on a lion hunt! My heart hurts for your loss, but I’m also grateful for the shared knowledge that the separation is temporary and you will all be reunited again one day! God be with you and your wonderful family as you keep his memory alive and know that he is always with you.
Tributes of Dad from my siblings…
Tributes
from the six oldest granddaughters
Tuesday Adult Dinner at my Dad’s favorite place, Thai Hut
We had already scheduled to be together this night. Weeks earlier, when Dad was here we had thought about getting take out from his favorite restaurant THAI HUT, and bringing it to the house to be near him, but after he passed we decided to gather at the restaurant in his honor. Scott, Elisha, Amy and Chris, Mike and Carly, Brian, Mom, Chris and I and Katie, Emily, Megan and Molly. We sat around a big table and enjoyed being together. Mom and I ordered and shared his favorite meal… sweet and sour chicken. We got another little peek at baby Melanie. Mike and Carly are being so careful with her so she doesn’t get sick. We gifted her our little baby present — the cutest Jellycat Fox. It was a fun night to be together.
Wednesday, November 23rd
Dressing Dad’s Body at the Serenity Mortuary
Chris and the kids and I did some fun shopping at the Fashion Place Mall and then Chris took the kids to pizza after they dropped me off at the Mortuary.
At 3:00 Mom, Scott, Amy, Mike, Brian and I met at Serenity Mortuary to help Dad dress in his temple clothes. We waited in the waiting area while they dressed him in his white pants and shirt and then followed them in to his room to see his body lying on the table. We were immediately struck with how good he looked. Those last couple months and especially weeks, Dad just didn’t quite look like himself and they were able to do such a good job filling out his face and bringing back some color. It was good to see him look like himself. I offered a heartfelt prayer and then we very carefully and quietly finished a few things and enjoyed being together. It was definitely special to be there with Mom and experience it together.
Thursday, November 24th
Thanksgiving
While we celebrated Thanksgiving with the Johnsons up at the Lodge, my mom and her sisters hosted Thanksgiving together at my mom’s house. They had already planned to be together in Provo since my Dad wasn’t well enough to travel. To have that plan already in place turned out to be such a blessing. What a wonderful gathering. I was sad to miss out on everyone being together but glad that my mom was surrounded by family with so much help and support.
Mom, Scott and Elisha, Dan and Sarah (who had just arrived the night before), Chris and Amy, Mike and Carly, and Brian, all the grandkids, Bill and Susan, Jennifer and Mike, Jim and Susan and some of the cousins.
Friday, November 25th
Sibling Meeting at Scott’s House
Scott, Dan, Amy, Mike, Brian and I met at Scott’s house in the front living room to talk about ideas for sharing our memories at the funeral. We talked through some of the experiences and characteristics we wanted to share and it was absolutely one of the highlights of the week. We cried as we listened to and shared stories, and we laughed… a LOT. It was so fun. Lots of jokes, lots of laughing about ‘let’s not tell them this or that’. It was just the most wonderful glimpse into what his children thought of him. At the end we remarked that we should have just video recorded the whole thing and been done.
Normally I don’t think we would have needed to get together to talk about what we were saying, but Dad had requested that we stand to speak in pairs. Scott and I, Dan and Amy, Mike and Brian. Because of that we needed to talk through how we’d go back and forth. After sitting all together we divided up. Scott and I headed off to the computer and we drafted how our stories could go back and forth. When we first heard we’d be speaking in pairs both Amy and I joked, ok good, they can speak and we can cry. But the truth is, we all cry. But I have the most hilarious brothers so we’re in for both crying and laughing. It’s going to be great.
Earlier in the week, when we were deciding on the picture to go on Dad’s funeral program, Mom suggested this one. It’s just such a cute one of him. He had been on a hike with Mike and the girls and was showing Whitney a mushroom he picked from the ground. Whitney’s distain made him laugh and Mike was right there to capture it. We talked about the fact that it might be funny that he was holding a mushroom but we loved the picture anyway. Then the next day Dan suddenly texted out this new altered pictures. It made us all laugh so hard. We couldn’t exactly keep the popcorn picture for the program, but it sure is a fun memory of him and this week.
Setting up the Display with Aunt Dianne, Uncle Bryce and family
About 3:00pm, Dianne, Jeff and Lindsey and Bryce and Sandy came by the house with flowers. So fun to talk to them for awhile in the living room. Mom and I got choked up recounting the events leading up to Dad’s passing and Dianne and Lindsey got emotional as well. I think it was helpful for them to hear from us and process their own grief. Dianne always had a special place in my Dad’s heart as his youngest sister and Dianne always said with a wink, ‘David is my favorite brother’.
I knew Dianne would love the picture of Dad holding the popcorn so I showed her the program all ready to go, and then pulled up Dan’s altered picture. She laughed SO hard and immediately asked for me to send her the picture. So funny.
Soon Amy came home and joined in. We started to gather a few more things from the house to take over to the church and Bryce and Sandy and Dianne and the group was more than happy to help us collect, move things to the cars and follow us over to the church. Scott and Dan met us there. We worked on decorating the table and pulled out the TV to make sure the slideshow that Mike was working on, would work. So grateful to have everyone’s help and to be able to visit at the same time.
It was fun to set everything up and display some of our favorite pictures of him along with some items that really represent him… a ping pong paddle, badminton birdies, popcorn, a miniature jeep, car books, the hat he always wore, scriptures, a yellow volkswagen car and his little wingtip shoes. It was a fun collection.
With the display done, we headed back to Mom’s house for a Thanksgiving Leftover meal with Bryce and Sandy and also all of the Polley’s in town for Thanksgiving and now for the funeral. So fun to have a busy house full of family and good food. I stuck around for an hour or so and then headed back to the Lodge to join Chris and the kids who were partying with the Johnsons. The Grahams had come up for the afternoon and evening and they were playing games. Rob was thoughtful to come talk to me for awhile about my Dad and the experiences of the week as we ate my Dad’s favorite Cherry Cream Pie in memory of him.